"Team one, the operation is approved, proceed into viakali networks."

"Team two, is island net down yet?" "Yes sir, stage two of the operation is complete."

"Team three, have you began the insertion into Kali Msi headquarters?" "Yes sir, but we've run into trouble, I think the sgglers may of finally found a home that we can't knock down."

"Dang, they might actually gain members now that they have a home, hmm..."

"Sir, I have an idea, make sggl start a starcraft league, it will effectively halve their membership!  It will be the..."
 

First Seasonal Awards

And now presenting your host for tonight, the ever charmable [/\Chief/\] Wheeeeeeeeee quoter, Bobaroooo!
 
Bob's Obligatory Introduction
 
Before we begin these awards, I must ask for a moment of silence. I'm afraid I must announce that El-Dorado, who has run these awards for the past few seasons, has become too much of a star and is now out of SGGL's meager price range. For 'ol time sakes, "I am David Letterman to his Billy Crystal." :)

(Moment of Silence)

Unfortunately, we must make do without an emcee this year... just pretend El-Doh is there, it's the best we an do. Without further ado, the 1st annual sgsl awards!...

This is the 3rd different SGGL award writer, so I bet your wondering, what happens to the other ones after they get "removed from office" :). So for a brief section (mostly to take up space, like this long sentence which has no comprehensible purpose other then make the size of the awards that much bigger.) we shall probe into our MIA friends.

Our favorite league founder, has been MIA from kali for quite sometime. While not been spotted on kali for well over a month, he has made several appearances on bnet, only to disappear into the night as quickly as he appeared.

The other writer, El-Dorado, has been busy with, ermm.. no one knows, nor will it ever get finished, so it dosnt matter anyways.

:)

Anyway...

This season was full of gaming (for the most part) and a couple of controversies, although no real conspiraces took place like the old days. Although we went through not one, not two, but three servers this season until we have finally found a home to stay on (hopefully :).

How about with the servers? First, Lightstream (known as lamestream to some), although not very good in the first place, did provide a comfortable server until they decided to shut their doors. We ran to viakali to salvation, and after a couple of weeks, they could no longer hold us, and promptly shut down. Next, islandnet was a short stay, and that shut down too. We have kali msi right now, but how long until the SGGL curse strike again? Only time will tell...

Clan wars? I believe we had more clan wars cancel'd then ones that actually finished.

But, I'd rather be in this league then anyother, I've been through both the hardships and the good times, and am proud to be a member of SGGL :)

Lets use the following space to look at the seasonal winners for several catagories..

But first a word from our sponsor... 
 
Your sponsorship has been cancel'd due to abuse and multiple-clicking by members.

No, we weren't going to pay you anyways, bahaha.

Aim the missile err... nevermind :)
The Coolness Awards
The first league awards have nothing to do with starcraft skills, but are perhaps the most sought after that the league offers. As always zot has picked the winners. This season's winners, and next season's braggards, are:

Coolest New Clan Name

Coolest Clan Motto

Just remember, the preceding awards we're not based on skills, as indicated by the winners.. ;)
The Specialty Awards

The Generalist Awards

- or: the "it's a good thing you're in the SGSL" awards -

These are the people that routinely load up the standings based on that little percentage that indicates the variety of maps and races players win on. They can win on anything, and have.

Anyway, this award goes to the person with the highest generalist rating on the season.

The Pit Bull Awards

These gentle folks kept losing but never gave up, embodying the spirit of the league by playing for fun without caring for their rank. We pay tribute to these members:

The Starcraft Addict Awards

- sponsored this season by the Betty Ford Clinic -

Sponsored by the only person who has gotten the award twice, Bob. These are people that just play more games than anyone else and keep the league looking active :). We pay thanks to:

 
Most Valuable Players
These are the ones you wish you had in your clan. They remained loyal, kept playing, kept winning, and racked up more clan points by themselves than some entire clans had put together. Presenting the one-man-armies of the SGSL:

Division A

Division B

Division C

 
Divisional Champions
These awards are granted on the basis of the best seasonal score in each division. These represent the the players with the best overall combination of earned points, win/loss ratio and generalist rating for each division: hard-earned awards in every case.

Division A

Division B

Division C

 
Global Domination
They will fight in harsh atmosphere or the frigid cold of vacuum....

And now we come to the stuff folks have been fighting for: in the battle for global domination these are the SGSL's world powers:

Division A

Division B

Division C

 
Warlords
And now to acknowledge the 2nd-Season Warlords - the Great Ones of the SGWL: Honourable Mentions are also due to the others in the top 10:  

And there you have them, SGSL's first season award recipients. Be sure to toss them all wedgies in congraulations. :-)

This awards ceremony was closed captioned for the humour impaired.